No Surprise Here
Good Morning Friends. Happy Monday!
Sorry I had missed Friday’s blog. I actually was busy on Thursday night with plans and then I ended up making a banana bread that failed miserably. Note to self: coconut flour should never be used to bake with. I even knew this. I’ve had so many recipes fail because of that healthy little demon flour, but I tried it anyway, cutting in half what I planned on using and replacing with oat flour. Still didn’t work 🙁
Anyway, so I thought it was time to finally address my bikini prep things. No surprise here: I’m done for the 2014 season. Now, I’m not done forever, but I’m sure if you are a regular reader you saw this coming a mile away. To say the least, I was all over the place. My first prep was hard, no doubt- both mentally and physically. This time around it was unbearable. And actually the first 4 weeks didn’t even feel like prep, it was easy!
That was the problem, it was too easy in the beginning. Then as I reported when I had my breakdown, I had a hell of a time catching up on the leaning out process… but it finally did happen and people in the gym were all commenting on how lean I was getting. I felt great, I felt motivated, but I still felt empty.
So like I have said before:
- It’s not normal to break down in your car after every gym session
- It’s not normal to cry over eggs you have to peel
- It’s not normal to say no I can’t go out because I’m meal prepping
As I reach the end of my 20’s I realized my WHOLE life has been about where I’m going next. This is fine and it’s great to be goal oriented, but a few weeks back I had a conversation with G-Mama about all of this and she said “Katie when was the last time you had fun?”.
I had a blank look on my face…
Which told me the answer.
I never had fun college days, I was studying. Then I went directly into a medical job to get me into PA school (worst job of my life), then into PA school slaving away, then into a full time job immediately.
So as you saw these past couple of weeks I decided to be the fun Katie. I put bikini stuff on the back burner. I had lunch dates, went to the zoo, went to a fun concert with friends, I even spent one whole afternoon talking to G-Mama for hours about girl things while I sat and ate chocolate covered almonds. I just LIVED.
My stomach hated me for it yes, and I’m not as lean as I was 2 weeks ago, but I’m much happier.
So back to the bikini prep thing, on Saturday I did post on my personal Facebook a little explanation of what’s been going on with me. Here’s what I said:
Today I start the first day of my journey to the goal I wanted the whole time. My first NPC show in march, followed by the OCB East Coast Classic I did this past year. This prep was not for me, I didn’t listen to myself or my body. It didn’t feel right and I was doing it just to prove to people I could get lean again. BAD IDEA. There was no excitement. I dreaded the gym and my head was not in the game, so even though I put in so much to leaning out I walked away. Now I feel excited to push for the real goal. I have 23 weeks to transform my body into Wonder Woman. This go around I’m listening to myself, giving cheats in the beginning to keep myself happy and sane and when my body says not today I’ll listen! Luckily I have an amazing support system and awesome gym friends who push me and want to see me succeed. But for lunch yesterday I went out with a bang…
Yes, that lunch was good. I still hurt. Actually, it’s 3 days later and my stomach STILL hates me. When will it go away? I still feel like a puffer fish…
After my first shows, I wanted to do NPC the whole time because those girls are fierce competitors and the judges like muscle on bikini women. I was told over and over I wasn’t ready for it, so I listened and went with other shows. I never should’ve done this. So instead of RUSHING into something I don’t even want, I’m going to wait for the right time. In fact when my suit came a few weeks ago I knew it was THE SUIT for the Gladiator (the name of the show in March). I told myself if I continued prep this time I’d wear my old suit.
Over the next few months you will still find me in the gym, doing my normal routines. I will be eating my normal healthy foods with time for fun squeezed in between. December 27th marks the first day of my REAL prep for this show, but I consider myself to be in mini-prep right now. I’m going to train this whole time as if the show is weeks away, not months. I saw what happened when I didn’t own every gym session this go around. NEVER AGAIN!
No uncertainties– this suit is ready for March!
Aren’t we glad I figured all of this out?
Now if we could just work on the rest of my twisted life! 😉
Have a great day and don’t let anyone sway you away from your goals!
XOXO With a Cherry On Top,
PS. The winner of the Fabletics Giveaway was Amber C. with this comment:“I love Fabletics! I love the Amargoza outfit! I need the plum pants =)” Thank you to all that entered 🙂
Rebecca @ Strength and Sunshine
Good for you love! Take a breather and get back at it when your ready! Your so awesome no matter what!
I admire you even more for being REAL and being HAPPY!
Thanks Lisa 😀